January 7, 2009

  • This afternoon was the appointment Dmitry and I had with the Social Security office to apply for my one-time death benefit of $255, plus Dmitry's survivor benefits. Louis (who works in the Appeals area of SS) kindly agreed to meet me and provide moral support, which was good as I certainly needed it.

    BION, I had trouble finding the place. I've been to the SS office times out of mind but this time I couldn't locate the distinctive big ol' building. Fortunately I'd allowed plenty of time so managed to find it and pulled in to one of the parking lots across the street, only to discover that I was completely out of cash, having given Dmitry the last of it a day or two ago. The nice woman taking the money (EIGHT DOLLARS!!!), probably upon seeing my distress and tears, kindly offered to take a check.

    Met Louis outside and entered the building, making our way to the SS office proper where there was a computer station with a touch screen monitor. The top option was "0", for "I have an appointment, and when I pushed it here came the direction "enter the last four digits of the social security number." So I entered the last four digits of Don's SS number, precisely as I'd been instructed.

    The computer was sorry, but it couldn't find my appointment. Here. Take a number.

    This fritzed me out royally, as I did so have an appointment, and had received a confirmation letter for it....which I'd neglected to bring, more's the pity. Tried it again with the same result. Embarrassed myself and probably everyone in the crowded waiting area by starting to cry.

    These constant, relentless tears are getting really, really old.

    We went ahead and sat down to wait. Blessedly, my number was called quickly, the woman who came to the door disappeared to check to see whether I actually did have an appointment, reappearing a couple of minutes later to acknowledge that indeed I did, and someone would be with me shortly.

    After a short wait I was called and the three of us headed back into the bowels of the SS office. Mercy Maud, but it's a rabbit warren of cubicles back there!

    The Russian adoption certificate has to be sent off to be translated by a federal translator, as they do not accept anyone else's translation. Which, I suppose, makes a certain amount of sense. There's a form I need to get filled out verifying that Dmitry's in school, and I've got to get them his Russian passport so they can ascertain precisely which day he entered the USA after the adoption, which was when he became a citizen.

    So much for his Texas "birth" certificate! The man pointed out those documents can be easily faked, so that's why they want to see the passport.

    It was a depressing, emotional experience as I still cannot believe this has happened, and my Don is dead so that Dmitry can get survivor benefits.

    Neither life insurance check has shown up yet; I'm torn between thinking "Um, I sort of need the money" and shuddering at the thought of taking and depositing those checks, due to what they represent. I mean, yeah, okay, Don had life insurance but it wasn't supposed to be collected on.

    As that would mean he died.

Comments (8)

  • ((((hug))))

  • Oh Anne {{{hugs}}}

  • You should be getting ss too.  K receives benefits.  You  too are a survivor.  I'm sorry your day went terribly.  I am grateful that you were seen quickly and that the man was kind and not condescending.  I wish I could swoop down like a super hero and clear up all the stuff you need done.  Poor Demitry must not really understand all this.  How is your church?  Are they supporting you with meals and love? 

    Lots of love my dear dear friend.

    Heather

  • I expect Kathryn's receiving benefits due to Frank's having been with the corrections department. Widow's SS survivor benefits don't kick in until said widow is 60 years old (or becomes disabled).

    There were meals but no longer, which is fine. Having to think about and provide dinner gives me something useful to do. ;^)

  • I'm just stunned that the federal goverment was inefficient and full of red tape!   Surely it was just that office on that day?

    At least that part is behind you and you can press on other things that must be done.   "One day at a time" is a trite phrase, but it works. 

  • How terrible - I'm so sad for you.  Why not let me or someone deposit the checks for you?  I really want to do something to help.  Love, Jeanne

  • Thanks, but it turns out that as least as far as NYL goes, one gets a checkbook with the money having been deposited in a money market account.

    Writing a check isn't as traumatic as getting the lump sum check.

    Really rather a neat way of doing it.

  • Continueing to pray for you. 

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