January 1, 2009

  • Okay, okay. Happy new year! ;^)

    Seeing as how it's January 1, 2009 AD or January 1, 0 AD, depending upon how one defines the initials ("Anno Domini" or "After Don").

    And thus I set out on a new segment of life, one that doesn't include Don.  It wasn't a segment I wanted, but it's the one I've been given, so there it is.  As Jeremiah noted during a period of great grief for him:  "I know, LORD, that a man's way of life is not his own; no one who walks determines his own steps."  (Jer. 10:23)

    Have been reading Elisabeth Elliot's "The Path of Loneliness" and found it enormously helpful.  She has a friend who, when faced with her last child preparing to leave home, observed that "As painful and emotional as it seems now that Amy will be at home only one more year, I know that then there will be grace sufficient and a new set of marching orders.  And this gives such hope, for the Giver of the promise may be trusted!" (p. 65)

    A new set of marching orders.  Right now I've no idea what they'll be, but I must wait patiently for the LORD to reveal them. 

    Waiting patiently has never, I regret to say, been one of my strong suits, whether it's in line at the grocery store or for God to show His hand.  Yet over and over again in His Word that is precisely what we're called to do:  wait on Him. 

    Wait for the LORD; be courageous and let your heart be strong. Wait for the LORD.   Psalm 27:14

    We wait for the LORD; He is our help and shield.  Psalm 33:20

    I wait for the LORD; I wait, and put my hope in His word.  Psalm 130:5

    The LORD is good to those who wait for Him, to the person who seeks Him.  It is good to wait quietly for deliverance from the LORD.  Lamentations 3:25-6

    But as for me, I will look to the LORD; I will wait for the God of my salvation. My God will hear me.  Micah 7:7

    My impatient demand is to know what's going to happen to me NOW, but that's not the LORD's way.  He wants me to wait, trusting in Him, for He is "a father of the fatherless and a champion of widows" (Psalm 68:5), who "protects the widow's territory" (Proverbs 15:25).  In Jeremiah 49:11 He instructs "...let your widows trust in Me."

    Thus far, I fear I've not done a deedy job of it, instead fitting the description found in Hosea 7:14, i.e. "They do not cry to Me from their hearts; rather, they wail on their beds."

    The trouble with wailing on one's bed is that, aside from getting a headache and stuffy nose, one is prone to miss the good.  Focusing upon what we do not have can lead to our overlooking what we could have.  Going again to Jeremiah:  "This is what the LORD says:  Cursed is the man who trusts in mankind, who makes human flesh his strength and turns his heart from the LORD.  He will be like a juniper in the Arabah; he cannot see when good comes but dwells in the parched places in the wilderness, in a salt land where no one lives."  (17:5-6; italics mine)

    Pray that I stop wailing on my bed and instead cry to the LORD from my heart, so as to not miss the good when it comes.

    As it will.  He promised, and His promises are true.

Comments (5)

  • (From Alex) Thank you for sharing, Mama. I was always holding onto the "hope" that we find in Christ for when something painful was and will come in my life. I love that we have "hope" not only for a life filled with promises from our Savior, but also "hope" in a promise of eternal life with Him. You know what else has been really penetrating my heart? The definitions of "grace" and "mercy." The fact that we are given good things, the main one being eternal life, even though we don't deserve it is humbling. Grace. Then, the fact that we are not given what we DO deserve, Hell and separation from Him, is overwhelming. Mercy.
    I think that these things are really hitting me harder than before because now that I have been called to grieve and call on God for the hope I'd always believed in, my shortcomings are more visible in my own eyes. I want and need more than ever from our Lord, but I am seeing more that I have many shortcoming and sins that need to be dealt with. Thus I am able to see more His "grace" and "mercy." We'll be praying for you, Mama. Love, Alex

  • Very true, Alex! I quickly discovered there's nothing like grief to highlight the sin lurking within. :o h-no:

  • Wonderful post, Anne. And so very true. May I remember it when my time comes.

  • Ditto - Anne & Alex.  Very thought-provoking.  I know the Lord has something interesting and challenging for you to do. 

  • Oh, Anne! You bring a tear to my eye with this post. I'm rejoicing that your ear is open to the Father's call of "wait" and "trust". He is faithful, and His mercies are new every morning. He is taking good care of you in the midst of even this great sorrow. He will bring SUCH good from it, you know. (((HUG)))

    I love you, and continue in prayer that the Lord will always meet you where you are, and press in on your heart with the love that IS His heart. Amen.

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